The new SuperShaver 8! Womette’s new razor with not one,
not two, not six, but eight different blades!
Other razors just remove hair, but the SuperShaver 8 goes all
the way to the root of your problem, ensuring that you’ll
never have to shave, ever again. Let’s take a look.
1. The first blade gives you an even,
clean shave, while
2. The second blade cleans up any stubble
3. The third blade uses natural moisturizes
to soothe your skin before slicing through it like butter, eliminating
insidious pores where hairs hide out.
4. The fourth blade eases your fascia
from the underlying tissues, allowing your moisturized integument
to slip effortlessly into the garbage can.
5. The fifth blade gently lifts away
your capillary system, leaving a cool, tingling feeling that says
6. The sixth blade then deftly slices
evenly through your quadriceps and adjoining nerve bundles without
a single stray nick or cut.
7. The seventh blade, with the help
of Supershaver’s easy-to-grip handle, will glide effortlessly
through your femur. Its ease and convenience will leave you lightheaded,
wondering how you managed to make do with your old razor all those
4. Blade eight, which comes with our
patented disinfectant strip, will clean up any debris left behind.
Gently set your emancipated limb aside on a neatly folded towel,
and repeat on the remaining leg.
Note: You may experience some bleeding
the first time you use SuperShaver 8. In fact, you may bleed profusely.
This is normal (also, you may black out). If you do nothing to
stop the bleeding, you may rest assured that it will never happen
did you ever survive without us? SuperShaver 8. The last razor
you’ll ever own.